Boylesque

What Happens?
The Showgirls of Las Vegas keep a closely guarded secret among their pasty-clad ranks – the hidden location of Cinderella’s glass slippers! Crushed and transformed into go-go boots of gold, legend has it that their wearer will be given the gift of immortal beauty.

When a Flamingo Showgirl Reject blabs about the shoes whereabouts to Queen Cherry in exchange for a ham sandwich, the evil empress and her shirtless Galaxy Guards tear apart Sin City searching for the magic boots! With the city in crisis, Rocketboy cancels his eyebrow waxing appointment and takes off for Las Vegas to find the shoes before she does.

But it’s going to take more than a simple game of fetch for Rocketboy and Queen Cherry to claim the boots on their own. The International Council of Strippers and Massage Therapists challenge the mother and son to a dancing duel.

Whoever shakes their booty the best will be awarded the go-go boots…while the loser will have to marry Las Vegas comedian and steroid-head Carrot Top!

The Inspiration for the Cover
Only the poster for the Cher/Christina movie BURLESQUE could conjure up such a fabulous cover...and the most convoluted story to go with it!!!

Beware...The Night of the Pussyman!

What happens?
Who is that stalking the night? Sneaking through the alleyways? Snooping inside bank vaults? (And stealing Rocketboy’s underwear?!?) No, it’s not Tina Yothers… It’s the Pussyman!

Robby’s ex-boyfriend Klytus Katskill is in town – and he’s more obsessed with the retail clerk/go-go boy/mesh underwear model than ever before. When Robby rejects his engagement at a pajama party fundraiser for homeless game show hosts, Klytus tries to kill himself with an overdose of Meow Mix. But instead of committing suicide, Klytus will soon be planning a massive genocide as he is reborn into an unleashed force of terror!

Faster than you can say “Someone Change The Kitty Litter!” - the Pussyman is born. He gives Rocketboy two choices: either love him…or die!!!

Inspiration for the Cover
The Cheetah is one of the best villains - and most underused ones in terms of her pure potential of greatness - to ever face Wonder Woman. While there have been many incarnations of her (including the current version which looks like Hello Kitty on steroids) our heart belongs to the Super Friends version. Here's to you, Pussyman! We'll leave some cream out on the porch for you.

It's Okay! Rocketboy is Here!

What Happens?
The city of San Francisco is shrinking - and it's going to take more than a bottle of Viagra to make it big again!

When a flying vat of pimple-fighting cream accidentally explodes over the Golden Gate Bridge, it starts a chain-reaction of size-reducing proportions as the city's buildings, citizens, and pets become smaller...and smaller...and even smaller!

With San Francisco's defensive security force out-of-town at a meatloaf convention, it's up to Rocketboy and the SFPD Stripper Cop Division to stop the disaster before it's too late!

Inspiration for the Cover
A homage to the most amazing Power Girl cover ever...which was itself a homage to a Superman cover...which most likely was a homage to young, virile men ripping their shirts off in public at community picnics and business meetings in the 1940s.

Rocket Tyler Moore

What Happens?
Talk about a bad hair day! The country's leading hair gel has been switched with a serum that brainwashes metro-sexuals into killer-sexuals! Disguising himself as a contestant in the Mr. Minneapolis Hair Show pageant, it's up to Robby to find the killer, save the hair salon, and win the crown...all before bedtime!

Inspiration for the Cover
Besides the fact that Rocketboy is CATCHING Mary Tyler Moore's hat, there is also so much pure joy and fun in it. This was Michael's salute to Adam Hughes and his magical art.

Mommie Dearest 2: Queen Cherry

What Happens?
Rocketboy only fears three things: bad haircuts, pussycats, and his mother: Queen Cherry.

Empress of the faraway planet Allura, she was made queen of the galaxy on one condition: that she could provide the king a son. Giving birth to Robby, Queen Cherry promptly murdered the King and claimed the crown as her own.

Fearful that Robby would one day overthrow her kingdom, she set out to kill her baby boy as well - but the infant was rocketed to Earth by his nanny, raised by the Amish in Nebraska, and ran away to San Francisco to fulfill his destiny as a go-go boy, retail clerk, and superhero!

The Essay Contest: Win A Rehab of Your Choice. Such a ridiculous contest. I'm surprised it's not real.

Inspriration Behind The Cover
Batman had a fantastic villian named Magpie. This is our big, wet, French kiss to her.

Rocketboy vs. The Penetrator

What Happens?
All of the travel agents in San Francisco are missing! Is it the bad economy or...is it The Penetrator's evil scheme to destroy intercontinental relations between the United States and resort communities in the Caribbean, Australia, and Nicaragua?

Rocketboy skips his Spin Cycle class to face this demon head-on. Usually at the TOP of his game, Robby must use his VERSATILE powers to get at the BOTTOM of this situation.

The Bonus Story: Sales are sluggish. And the easiest way to make payroll? Show off boy's butts!

Inspriration for the Cover
This is our tribute to the "tentacle-porn" that seems to engage every male superhero out there. Even Superman was strapped up to a ridiculous device that looked like it was about to ram into him like Ricky Martin at a Menudo Reunion Tour!

The Day Madonna Took Over The Earth!

What Happens?
When Madonna rejects the marriage proposal of a crazed #1 fan from Missouri, she suddenly finds her life in danger as an army of Madonna Robots are unleashed upon the earth.

The robots kidnap Madonna's children Rocco and Lourdes...but worst of all, they also hold her personal trainer hostage! It's up to Rocketboy to "strike a pose" and face this blonde ambition of destruction head-on!

About the mini-story: Really, does anyone know? What the hell DID happen to Sheena Easton?!?

The Inspiration for the Cover
Superman had Braniac...Rocketboy has Madonna Robots. If you can spot the "Evita Madonna," I'll buy you a drink next time you're in town.

The Worst Dinner Party Ever

What Happens?
What does a new superhero do to introduce himself to the influential "Who's Who" of American society? Throw a dinner party! But Robby can't cook, so he makes it a potluck instead.

Between Nancy Pelosi's Rocky Mountain Oysters and Hilary Clinton's Swedish Meatballs, no one is having a very appetizing meal. The final straw is when Sarah Palin serves Baked Alaska to Michelle Obama in black face...and then the whole party just goes right to hell.

And for the mini-story: who DOESN'T want to know what's on Margot Kidder's grocery list?!?

Inspiration behind the cover:
The wonderful catfights between Lois Lane and Lana Lang fighting over Superman. Just imagine what those two would bring to a potluck!